A requested post.

I never know what to write about.  Today I told my wife that I never know what to write, she suggested soap.  The controversy between girly and manly soap.

Fine.  I don't care if the soap is in a bar and "manly" or in a bottle with lots of flowers on the label and "girly"; does it get me clean and rinse off easily?  If yes to both then I'll use it.  Except for the girly soap with dirt in it.

I know it's not really dirt, they call it moisturizing beads or some crap like that; it's dirt to us laymen.  Deal with it all of you marketing weasels.  Whenever I use the soap with dirt in it I feel like it doesn't rinse off so I spend I don't know how long trying to get that damn dirt out of my chest hair.

My grandmother used to make lye soap, I would like to have some of that.  I sure as hell wouldn't use it, just keep it because my grandmother made it.  I'll even give you her recipe as written by my father over a decade ago.

The Ingredients:

2 gallons hog cracklings (6 pounds)
1.5 quarts water
1 can lye

Mix ingredients in a wash pot.  Build a fire around the pot.  Stir mixture until all cracklings are completely dissolved.  Push the fire away and souse with water to put it out.  Continue stirring soap until color turns cream or white and begins to thicken.  Place a washtub over the pot to protect the soap from dust and smoke and leave it overnight to harden.  Slice and store in a safe dry place.  This soap can be used for washing clothes, dishes, dirty hands and in real hard times for taking baths.

Some of the people who had more time than my mother made fancy soap by putting in perfume and pouring it up into flat square pans so that pieces could be cut evenly and square.